I can see the love in the world for you, for others, but not for me. I have a love for the world and you but the love for me is cruelty. Unless I can superficially hurt and challenge myself, scar my muscle fibers, push past my points of failure and find limits, I have no will....I just get by. I need pain filled endorphins to feed the adrenaline that pumps my pulse for life. It's my way to avoid the anxiety, insanity and the claustrophobia of complacency. As society craves to make things simpler, softer, quicker and more convenient, I involuntary protest by hardening my resolve, staying conditioned to pain, driving the brain lean of all excuse and trimming the fat of justification to stay efficient, punctual, disciplined and intense. While the other breathing things spread more grey, I need to stay in the black and white. This presidential campaign is just one example of the fucked up grey world that needs trimming. Two grown adults bickering, belittling and publicly patronizing each other instead of fixing themselves and the country. I'm embarrassed to be human if these mannequins fit that bill. Stop counting your reps and comparing them to the other, make them count! These bleating sheep have spent too much time in comfort instead of the real fields to give real perspective to the Hurd. I don't waste my energy on it. I place it all into love - the love for cruelty upon myself. Materialistic possessions, acquaintances, trends, politicians....they come and go, but my resolve to evolve will remain the same. #notimetobleed
#facefear #partanimalpartmachine *photo taken by Gary Phillips